It is no secret that the band wife life is difficult, you might know this now from my constant complaining and crying about it. Life is always a challenge, for sure, and this is just my point of view on the glorious paradise we are living. Also, as we all know, I am low key to the point where the slightest breeze of chaos makes me loose my cool. All in all, though, I know I am blessed with a simple, happy life.
I just happen to be married to a busy man, a very busy man and it’s that time again. He’s in the studio again, playing more gigs to make the money for the studio, and this busy, bitter cold gig season is fully upon us. You see, when I started this blogging journey it was just a little after the husband joined a band, the right band, the band that took off, which means they must take off frequently. So, he joined a band, and I joined some support groups.
Unfortunately, I find myself in a group on my own, most musicians I have noticed are self-sufficient. It’s their full-time job. The Husband, on the other hand is not. A very unfortunate circumstance, it obviously is his greatest desire to make it his career and mine for him as well. The band just hasn’t made it big enough yet to supplement the income needed. Sadly, a little-known fact, my early childhood education job does not pay enough to support a family, either.
The silver lining to this, is that he doesn’t travel far, yet (but, like I said, this is the ultimate goal). I am relishing the time we do have before touring starts. The down side, is he doesn’t have a lot of that time. He is trying to juggle the rockstar dream with white picket fence normalcy. Just call him Hannah Montana, but he’s an adult, with adult bills and responsibilities, and many more stresses.
His life is busy. I know, I constantly complain about my life being busy, and even though this is our life together, he is the one on the go. I just try to keep track of him and keep the house hold in check. I thought I would give everyone a peek into the life of a working musician.
The Husband’s day starts at around six in the morning. He gets up and gets himself and the kids ready. He is in charge of the kids in the morning because I am gone by five thirty for work. This works for now, because with all the band business in the evening, at least he still is consistent and has that time with them in the morning.
He drops them off at school and heads into work. We all know how work goes, it is supposed to be a nine to five, but usually goes until six or seven, depending on how busy he is. Texting me his frustrations as he goes. On top of the nine to ten hours he works a day, he also is on call one week out of the month, which has him going all hours of the day and night.
Then it’s home he goes… for a quick shower, maybe a bite to eat, and off he goes with a kiss good bye to the band room for practice, the studio for recording, or somewhere for a video shoot. There is loading and unloading the band trailer, before and after shows, set up time and drive time. Even when he’s home there is business, emails, networking, writing, practicing. He might crawl into bed around midnight, for a few hours of sleep and get up to do it all over again.
We are always grateful for his presence, though, the kids and I are grateful for that. Some people don’t get even that with fathers and husbands who are taken too early, some are sent thousands of miles away for months to years on end, to unsafe places. I know we are blessed beyond reason to have him home to sleep most nights.
These musicians work double time for their dream, they challenge themselves daily, I know his band mates are all the same. Juggling family and music is not easy. These musicians love their families, and support their homes, but the music will always drive them and be embedded in their hearts. We hope one day they will succeed in their dream, be able to focus on music and take the second job out of the equation.
Until then, we make it work. The husband has always been a responsible family man, and I am blessed to have him. Not only does he always support and love us unconditionally, but he is always working toward his dream. I admire him, I am proud to call him husband, and he is really a fun guy to hang out with.